Nine

There are better ways of spending some quality staycation time than watching the failure of a musical, Nine, like ironing. In fact, I was ironing just before I decided to catch this mess. I wonder why I choose this flick after all, I am not really a fan of musicals especially the newer ones.

Nine extends Frederico Fellini’s 8 1/2 onto the Great White Way. It is a musical devoted to the writer’s block from a great director who can’t put his latest movie down in script. He spends time dredging a semblance of a tale from the various ladies in his life, the wife, the mother, the mistress, the confidant, the leading lady, the whore. Each girl contributes something for him to use and amuse himself into writing a movie.

Penelope Cruz was the mistress. I like her corset. Sophia Loren was the mother. She’s old. Marion Cotilliard is the wife. She’s resigned. Fergie was the whore. She had the best song (supposedly), the only song I think I’ve heard about.

Nine was supposedly a Tony winner. The songs were also. I thought the songs were not remarkable. I don’t think I liked any of the songs. I should’ve walked out.

1 of 5 stars.

Posted by broderic

Yo! I'm the writer here. Super sauce.

6 Replies to “Nine”

  1. so they should leave it to Baz Luhrmann?

  2. I'm not too sure, since I haven't seen the complete Moulin Rouge.

    I think the songs do make the musical though. The fact that I wasn't familiar with any of Nine's songs was a big detriment to the movie.

    Another thing is that the film was trying to hard. It had similar staging as Chicago which makes it terribly derivative.

    I wonder if Nine being an unfamiliar musical.

  3. I love musicals. I love what Lars Von Trier brought to the musical world. The musical element as a form of escapism and wonder contrasted by reality was simply amazing. Dancer in the Dark is just an amazing piece of filmmaking. Not just because of Bjork, but just what Trier did with the musical.

    I've said it before, Moulin Rouge is one of the best modern Musicals. It just really is one of a kind.

    I actually thought Hair Spray was well done and I really enjoyed Dream Girls save for some of it's cheese.

    Then there's Lagaan.

    I do think you need more than just good songs to make a musical though. Across The Universe beatles renditions were actually quite good, but the implementation was friggen terrible and hokey. I mean I can see why some people like it. The cinematographer is quite nice… but over all it just felt hollow. Same goes for Chicago. I thought it had decent music, but the film just felt by the numbers and just didn't connect. John C Reily's "Mr. Cellophane" song was wonderful though.

    But I do agree if you're making a musical, you better damn well not be lazy in the song writing department. Nine just felt derivative like you said. Also the story was lacking, and you plain just didn't care for it's characters.

    Most of all NO ONE should attempt Fellini. No one.

    I was really hoping this would be halfway decent. 8 1/2 is one of my all time faves. It's just a wonderfu film that ties a filmmaker with his dreams, desires, fears, and his art. Just an amazing work. God I love that film. Can't wait to see it again in Blu next week! Yahoo!

    Puh parra puh purrah indeed! Heh. Puh parra puh purrah(That's what he blurts out after the little move he does in the hallway)

    Damn, too bad Nine sucked entirely. First time in a while I just wanted to up and leave.

  4. I'm glad someone brought up Dancer in the Dark. I remember seeing this and loving it. Years later, I bought the soundtrack and enjoyed listening to it. But at the third listen it started grating on my nerves.

    I still love it though, Selmasongs. and I know it's cheesy, but every now and again I catch myself singing "Don't cry for me Argentina" madonna version of Evita. Lame but it's stuck in my head.

  5. Maybe you were there to see the chicks… you just don't want to admit to it ;P

  6. I will happily admit to going to a movie to see the chicks. Unfortunately, this one would make me want to run away as quickly as possible.

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