Tag: review

There are better ways of spending some quality staycation time than watching the failure of a musical, Nine, like ironing. In fact, I was ironing just before I decided to catch this mess. I wonder why I choose this flick after all, I am not really a fan of musicals especially the newer ones.

Nine extends Frederico Fellini’s 8 1/2 onto the Great White Way. It is a musical devoted to the writer’s block from a great director who can’t put his latest movie down in script. He spends time dredging a semblance of a tale from the various ladies in his life, the wife, the mother, the mistress, the confidant, the leading lady, the whore. Each girl contributes something for him to use and amuse himself into writing a movie.

Penelope Cruz was the mistress. I like her corset. Sophia Loren was the mother. She’s old. Marion Cotilliard is the wife. She’s resigned. Fergie was the whore. She had the best song (supposedly), the only song I think I’ve heard about.

Nine was supposedly a Tony winner. The songs were also. I thought the songs were not remarkable. I don’t think I liked any of the songs. I should’ve walked out.

1 of 5 stars.

Watching the movie, Sherlock Holmes, is similar to reading the Arthur Conan Doyle books, because you’ll be puzzled about the mystery until the end when Holmes shows his work.

Basically, the plot is to take down the British government, recapture the United States and take over the world by the Illuminati or whatever they’re called in this book. Holmes and his trusty sidekick use wit, muscle and the power of deduction to stop the plan. Do I even have to tell you that they succeed?

Robert Downey Jr. as Sherlock Holmes had me wondering when he was gonna crawl into an Iron Man suit. Jude Law is a pretty Dr. Watson. Rachel McAdams was wasted in this movie and I kept wondering if her character was ever in any Holmes novel.

Sherlock Holmes is a good winter diversion.

3 of 5 stars.

For a moment there Up In The Air tried to be about redemption. A man lives his life on the road afraid of commitments, relationships, baggage, but with the help of three women in his life he finds that life is more than traveling. Then a twist that you knew had to be coming comes and the movie gets our leading man back on the road where he belongs.

The trailers lead you to believe that George Clooney finally gets off the road to now where. He doesn’t. He is defined by the mileage and the rental cars and the gold club and the flying. Girls try to change him. But it really isn’t him. And so he stays the same. All the better for it.

I didn’t like that he didn’t change. I thought he would and we would have a feel good movie. When he didn’t, I felt lost. I wanted to fly away from the theatre.

Are there moments in my life where traveling would be fun? Yes. Do I like to fly? No. Especially if there are pantsu bombers out there.

3 of 5 stars

I’m gonna service the queue and the first movie up is Avatar which I saw opening night before the big snow storm in surreal “IMAX” 3D.

I was always very skeptical on the look of the film. James Cameron spent upwards of $300 million on this movie and in the commercials it looks like a Halo cut scene. With my 3D goggles on that first night, it looked like $300 million on the screen, and it did not look like a cut scene. It looked pretty awesome and pretty, too. All that $300 million to render and make the physics look good was worth it. But that $300 million did not pay for a story.

The movie’s plot has been compared to Dances With Wolves and other films of white guys going to the natives. And it sure was very similar. The Terminator guy loves his blue skinned honey. He loves his blue skinned avatar as well as it gives him the mobility that this shriveled legs lack. He gets his legs back and his soul back to save a planet. And of course to condemn another planet to death.

Avatar had weird politics. It asked the audience to cheer for the Indians as they slaughter the pioneers. It asked the audience to choose to root for the insurgents as they blew up IEDs on the unsuspecting soldiers. It asked the audience to be bigoted against the other. For a group of people that valued a universal emotional/physical bond, the Nav’i sure hate those that are not the same. They expel the humans from Nav’i world with extreme prejudice. I don’t understand why they let some humans stay.

Avatar also had weird concept of evolution. Does it work the same way on planet Nav’i as it does on earth? Then what’s up with the ethernet jacks. I wonder how these things evolved, and what is the evolutionary need of such a thing on all the things there.

The visuals were a feast for the eyes, but I was too busy trying to understand the evolution of these species to fully get into the movie.

The battles were pretty good, James Cameron is a cheese master though, the movie had a Phantom Menace vibe as it could not live up to the hype, and I couldn’t help but notice that it was a mash up of many different movies: Princess Mononoke, The Matrix trilogy, Dance With Wolves, etc. Cameron is frustrating on the story end.

3 of 5 stars.

You've probably never heard of An Education (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1174732/). Me too. But we caught it at the Landmark down by the harbor. Then we got some drinks at the Irish pub.The movie is adapted from the writer's memoirs as she grew up in England. She's skipping school, dumping her sixth form boyfriend, and hanging out at art auctions with a cad. He takes her to Paris, introduces her to mature things, and takes her virginity. Oh, to be young, English and in love!You just know that it can't be so straight forward. There'll be some measure of violence, physical or emotional, visited upon our young heroine. The rules of a memoir always state that you must first be naïve, then the world must come crashing down on you, then you emerge wiser than your years. Our young heroine was played by Carey Mulligan who, in this film, was a dead wringer for the traveling pants girl. I swear to kami-sama that it was her, but had to wait for the credits to figure out if it was her. It wasn't and I was delighted and disappointed. What's her name again? And will I care later?My problem with the film is that I didn't really connect with the girl. What was it supposed to be like to be 16, English, sixth form, stressed at A levels? I don't know, so I couldn't connect. And after a bit I didn't care. I wanted to see the violence heaped on her, but that violence was so benign that it deflated the movie. That was it? The big revelation? Meh.So, I can like it for the cad from London but overall: meh. I think I drank the next to nights and forgot all about this movie. The rating reflects the lack of hatred towards or attraction to this movie. It's middle of the road for me.3 of 5 stars.

One thing can be said about the Coen brothers latest film, A Serious Man (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1019452/), it sure is Jewish. What seems to be a reflection at being Jewish, A Serious Man, is, if anything, another of their head scratching efforts. Or at least, it will take you some time to figure out what it is the Coens are driving at in their movie. Again, the Coens make you leave the theatre quietly in reflection.A Serious Man opens with a Jewish parable. A man meets a neighbor on the lonely road home and invites him for some tea. Before the neighbor's arrival, the man's wife tells him that the neighbor isn't all that he is. He is a demon reincarnated after he died. Or he could just be a resilient man who survived. The wife takes it upon her to show her husband that she is right leaving the neighbor injured and dying. Or is he a demon and will survive? Are they blessed or cursed?The rest of the movie follows Larry Gopnik, a college professor, as he goes through trials and tribulations that Job would have found hard to get through. His wife wants a divorce to marry a divorcee friend. His children don't really care for him. His students are annoying. His brother is troublesome. And his neighbors are either racists or bored, free spirit housewives. Larry has to deal with all this even though he doesn't know why it is all happening to him.He tries to see a rabbi who will tell him what to do and what it all means. Yet, can you trust the advise of the religious? For example, the parking lot. Or for another example, Jefferson Airplane. It's all meaningless. So Larry is left to ponder how one is left to the fates. He is lurched from bad to good all the while helpless but persevering. When it all works, is he blessed or cursed?The Coens always make a film that you have to ponder about. This one makes me think of Barton Fink. I thought A Serious Man was penned by Barton Fink. Both films protagonists are afloat in the world that seems to have it against them, and they are powerless to effect change. It is fate, god, Hashim that animates their world, but why does He seem to be leveling pain and suffering. Perhaps, to the Coens their Jewish-ness is inherently un-understandable. What is it about their religion that motivates the Jews to be put upon? And should they stand for it?Finally, what is it with the Coens and Asians? Whenever an Asian is in their film prepare for a bizarre characterization. It'll make you cringe.3 of 5 stars.