Tag: review

300. I saw this opening weekend with a big, black lady oohing and aahing at the abs of the spartans. She wanted to take one home. It’s very homoerotic. Too much like a video game.

3 of 5 stars.

The Lookout. For the life of me I don’t know why this was rated “R.” Blood and guts? Not so much. Robbery? Maybe. Sex? Trite but no skin.

3 of 5 stars.

Movie watching continues apace. I really wanted to write some deep insightful reviews of these three, but can never get them started.

Catch and Release. It was a Jennifer Garner weekend that was. This movie is a supposed romantic drama-dy, and such it disappointed on both the romantic end, the dramatic end, and the comedic end. You saw all the funny parts in the trailer. The drama was used as an explanation to the marketers as to how the movie really didn’t have too much laughs. The romance! The romance? I just didn’t get. Your fiance dies and you want fall for the one person who’s a cad? Please. In a comment at Margeaux’s, I believe the film to be too sappy, because it embraces the love story in the end. If it ended with them not making up and her out on her own it would’ve felt real. As for that, it felt like another marketing decision and the director/writer should’ve know to stick to her convictions of the story and not have them hook up again. It would’ve been a smarter, mature movie that way.

2 of 5 stars.

Because I Said So. Someone should’ve asked her to keep her mouth shut. What is happening to Diane Keaton? And what is happening to Mandy Moore? Keaton is Annie Hall, but that character is feeling a bit sad in her old age. Moore is in another bad movie. Whatever? I should not have seen this one.Capitol Swell has a better review. Let’s just say Mandy Moore needs to read more better scripts.

2 of 5 stars.

The Messengers is a j-horror film in the middle of Nebraska. Yes. That sounds incongruous and the movie was. It was filled with worn out j-horror images. Things you’ve seen in other movies. J-horror is becoming extremely tired like the slasher horror genre before it. They need to make creepier films built to scare the bejeebus out of you when you get home. After watching this, I was scared but soon forgot why by the next morning.

2 of 5 stars.

I’m not sure if it’s a latin thing, but they like to tell stories that are rooted in a style that’s called “Magical Realism.” Again, I’m not sure, but these stories deal with the real world, but add an element of fantasy to them which make them more whimsical in nature.

The latest two movies I have seen both seem to be part of that genre, Pan’s LabyrinthVolver. Both are done by well regarded directors, Guillermo del Toro and Pedro Almodovar. The former a relative new comer who has been heaped praises upon his most recent outing, and the latter a highly acclaimed Spanish director. Each of these films present a world on the cinema screen that builds some fantastical feelings when watched.

Pan’s Labyrinth is the more straight outright fantasy. You could tell, what with the fairy tale setting and elaborate “Princess of the Underworld” myth-making. The story takes place in Franco’s Spain as the liberal guerilla fighters battle against the fascist Spanish government. Within this setting a little girl finds herself in an unfolding myth of fairies and fauns that are helpful or not. She is told that she is the lost princess of the underworld and must complete three tasks to return to it triumphant.

It is here, where the audience must connect with the girl and the magic needs to happen within the viewer. The other characters in the movie don’t seem to realize that there are fairies or they don’t believe. Is it all in her head?

The tasks are performed in another fantasy realm. This is in contrast to the fascist spain. The real world intrudes on the fictional world that seems to be all coming from the girl’s imagination. Again, is it all in her head?

As I watched, I did not get the point of the juxtaposition of both worlds. I wanted to spend more time in the fantastic realm and felt the real world encumbered the story. Yet, del Toro needed both for the story to work.

The ending left me with the impression that it was all in her head. The fantasy realm she created was to escape her situation. She did and became princess of the underworld, but not the way you would expect. Bittersweet, but necessary.

3 of 5 stars.

Volver started in the real world. The characters are modern day people doing modern day things in Spain. Yet, whimsy to comes to them.

This was the first Almodovar film I have seen. I heard of his use of women characters, but was taken back with the fact that that was all there is in this one.

The story begins with the visit to Raimunda’s parents grave and to her Tia. There the stage is set for the return of someone once thought dead, her mother. When she does, I could not think that she was really alive, but a ghost to help guide her daughters through difficult straights. That’s when I felt it entered the “magical real” realm. Alas, she was very much alive. And she very much helped her daughters out.

More telling is that this movie felt to my mom to be very filipino-ish. I may be because under spanish rule, the Philippines may have inherited some of the “magical realism.” Regardless, the story featured some light-hearted twists that were not readily discernible so that they surprise.

The movie itself is a surprise, and I should add some Almodovar to my Netflix queue.

4 of 5 stars.

Freedom Writers is an inspirational movie. Aren’t they all? You could’ve probably guessed the plot for this one. Take one beleagured teacher. In this case Hilary Swank is the new teacher in town who has to salvage a school in the throes of integration after the LA riots. Add in an underachieving class. The freshmen english Swank has to teach is filled with the bused in kids from the projects. Get them to perform past their capabilities. The class writes to the lady who hid Anne Francke and she visits to inspire them. Don’t forget the indifferent school administration. And the struggle on the home front for the teacher.

Yeah, you could’ve written it. Although it does inspire you. Plus some early 90s hip-hop. Good and solid.

3 of 5 stars.

I have recently seen two movies that portray the future of mankind as bleak, Children of Men and Idiocracy. The first is the film adaptation of PD James’s novel, and the latter is from the mind of Mike Judge who brought us Beavis and Butthead and Office Space. Their tones are so much different the one a high-falutin’ angsty expression the other downright absurd comedy, but they point to the fact that mankind’s future is not so bright. I liked the comdey, but the drama in Children of Men held some problems.

Several minutes into Children of Men, you are left to ponder how, scientifically, the world’s human females could not produce children. In science fiction, usually that question doesn’t have to be answered. You should let the story unfold. You should settle in and feel what the movie should be telling you.

Except with this movie you get doubts. Why? How does the world devolve into a state of chaos after the realization that the human race cannot reproduce? Wouldn’t it be that human life has become more valuable?

It is missing the backstory. Not that every distopian future needs a backstory, but it needs to be believable that this could happen. I needed an explanation for why it was the female humans could not have babies. So that the lady with the baby becomes even more fantastic. A miracle of sorts. Without the scientific explanation, I couldn’t buy into the story.

Several minutes into Idiocracy, you feel that this is the future if we don’t wise up. The people are stupid because only the stupid are making babies. It points out that our worship of stupid will get us into some trouble in the future. It’s stupid and funny, but downright scary and sad. “So basically it says here you’re fucked up, you sound like a fag, and your shit’s all retarded.”

3 of 5 stars. Children of Men
4 of 5 stars. Idiocracy

I saw the best picture so far this year just two days shy of the end. While it certainly doesn’t make up for the fact the year in movies sucked, it definitely made watching film a nice experience again.

The Queen deals with the death of Lady Diana and how the royal family dealt with it the week leading to her funeral. The Queen decided to show the famous British stiff upper lip which didn’t play too well with the English mood at the time. They wanted to see remorse and mourning, but got no show of emotion. It left the royalty in a bad situation. Compounding it was the newly elected Prime Minister, Tony Blair, who had summed up the value of the dead Diana as the People’s Princess. The film focuses upon his craft at getting the royals to open up.

What struck me most about this film is the parallels with the US. Or more particularly George Bush. As the death of Lady Diana plays out, the Queen stoically does nothing to show that her death is important. She spends days ill prepared on what to do. She seemed like W in his infamous minutes after the 9-11 attacks. Quietly thinking should I be doing something. Another thing is the aspect of paying respects for someone not quite royalty. Think about former President Ford’s week of mourning ritual being carried out right now. We have elevated the post of President into something of a royal position. Which leads to the contrast of the Prime Minister. I thought he lived in a hovel (10 Downing St.) in the movie and I was amazed how common his home was. A leader of a quasi-democratic government being of the people. Fucked up thing about the US is that only millionaires can be President. We have become the British.

Anyway the movie was well acted. The story line was suspenseful. I laughed a few times. It was a good show. The best this year. Why did it take 363 days for it to happen? And why the Brits?

5 of 5 stars.

I’ve seen several of the films that have come out during this holiday season. They reinforce the fact that movies suck. I need a hiatus. You may also want to take a hiatus.

The Holiday. I am waiting for Nancy Myers to direct a Nora Ephron screenplay. Then I am waiting for Nora Ephron to direct a Nancy Myers screenplay. Then I will die.

2 of 5 stars.

Blood Diamond. Diamonds are forever. And so is the grief it causes to the African nations which mine them. At least there was action in this film. Something missing in these that I had seen.

3 of 5 stars.

The Good Shepherd. Long and involved. I have nothing bad to say about it, because they’re listening. (All hail the mighty CIA. Thanks for protecting America!) I have nothing good either.

3 of 5 stars.

The Pursuit of Happyness. Will Smith wants an Oscar badly.

3 of 5 stars.